The Bible is so rich and profound that I truly believe it holds answers to every question we could ever ask. While it may not always address our exact circumstances in detail, it provides clarity, wisdom, and principles applicable to literally every area of our lives.
Joseph’s habit of reporting negatively on his brothers was unwise and counterproductive. It’s usually better to remain silent than to give bad reports about others, particularly when done spitefully or to gain favor. Jacob already loved Joseph more than his other sons—there was no need for Joseph to worsen the situation by highlighting his brothers’ flaws. Jacob was likely already aware of his sons’ shortcomings and tendencies.
For example, Simeon and Levi had a reputation for violence. In their rage, they wiped out an entire city, killing all the men because Shechem had violated their sister, Dinah. While Shechem’s actions were indefensible, slaughtering innocent people who had no chance to defend themselves was an excessive and cruel response.
Reuben, the eldest, dishonored his father by sleeping with Jacob’s concubine, an act that ultimately cost him his position as firstborn (1 Chronicles 5:1).
Judah, another brother, slept with someone he believed to be a random prostitute, only to later discover it was his daughter-in-law, Tamar. She had disguised herself in anger and bitterness because Judah had failed to give her his youngest son in marriage after the deaths of his first two sons. While Judah suspected Tamar of causing their deaths, the scripture reveals that his sons were wicked in God’s eyes, so He killed them. (Genesis 38:6, 9).
When you must give an honest review, particularly at your place of work, wisdom is key. Begin by acknowledging the person’s strengths or the areas where they have excelled. This sets a tone of fairness and balance. Then, carefully and respectfully address the areas where improvement is needed. This approach not only builds trust but also ensures the feedback is constructive rather than destructive.
Resist the temptation to bring others down in the bid to express yourself.
Thankfully, ‘Official English’ provides a way to communicate feedback, even harsh truths, without being overtly offensive.
As a mother who knows what it feels like to be the least preferred child, I strive to treat my children as fairly and equally as possible. Of course, I also recognize that their varying ages and abilities come with different responsibilities. However, blatant favoritism, as Jacob showed, often leads to strife and unintended consequences.
We see a similar dynamic earlier in Jacob’s life. His love for Rachel over Leah had significant repercussions. Scripture tells us that because Leah was unloved, God opened her womb, while Rachel remained barren for years (Genesis 29:30-31). Leah went on to have four children initially, and even more through her maid, Zilpah. Rachel’s maid, Bilhah, also bore children before Rachel finally conceived and gave birth to Joseph.
From a human standpoint, Jacob’s actions might seem justifiable. He never intended to marry Leah; he loved Rachel from the beginning. He was so deeply in love with her that he worked for seven full years for her father, tending to his livestock, just to win her hand in marriage. However, after the wedding ceremony, he was shocked to discover that he had been deceived and had married Leah instead! That must have been an incredibly painful blow. Eventually, Jacob was given Rachel after the first week of his marriage to Leah, but he had to commit to another seven years of labor to fully fulfill his agreement.
Although Laban claimed it was because tradition required the firstborn to marry first (Genesis 29:22-29), we all know the real reason was that he recognized how much his business flourished because of Jacob. This was simply Laban’s devious way of ensuring Jacob stayed longer, benefiting from his labor and the blessing on Him. (Genesis 30:27-30).
We can sympathize with Laban’s situation, but the truth is that God sees and loves every individual, and He understands what each person is going through (Genesis 18:30-31).
I imagine that Leah, feeling unloved and overlooked, sought solace in God, sometimes weeping about the treatment she received from Jacob. God sees those who are hurting and always has compassion for them, even when others fail to see their worth.
God sees and values everyone, including those who feel overlooked or unloved. Leah likely turned to God in her pain and disappointment. In His compassion, God blessed her with children as a consolation for the neglect she endured from her husband.
Favoritism, whether in marriage or parenting, carries heavy consequences. It fosters jealousy, rivalry, and broken relationships.
Key Scripture to Study
Genesis 36.
