“But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace to me was not without effect.
No, I worked harder than all of them, yet not I, but the grace of God that was with me.” (1 Corinthians 15:10)
Have you ever seen a dress that looked absolutely stunning on someone else, or even on a mannequin, and thought, Yes, that’s it! You imagine how good you would look in it, only to try it on and feel like weeping in the changing room.
Or have you ever seen two people wearing the exact same outfit, yet looking completely different? One looks absolutely elegant, while the other looks mismatched and uncomfortable, almost as though the dress was forced on her. And yet, both outfits were made by the same designer and are exactly alike.
Clothes have this almost deceptive quality. On the hanger or the mannequin, they look perfect. Flawless even. But when you try them on, you are shocked. I have had quite a number of these moments. It wasn’t that the dress was ugly or even a “what I ordered versus what I got” situation. It was simply a matter of the body of the mannequin, or model, versus mine. The dress looked good, just not on me. It’s more like, what fits that form doesn’t quite fit mine.
In fact, this is why I stopped buying clothes online. I prefer to go in for fittings and see how I look in them. I like to avoid stories that touch.
The last time I experienced this, it got me thinking about how often we try to wear what was never designed for us. Styles, mannerisms, personalities, paths, even callings. We want to walk like certain people, talk like them or live like them, at the expense of losing ourselves.
We forget that what looks beautiful on someone else fits them because it was tailored for their frame. Physically, emotionally, spiritually, and even culturally. They are custom-made by their journey, their upbringing, their genetics, their temperament, their battles, and their grace. So they look good being themselves. The ‘act’ fits them (and they aren’t even acting) but doesn’t fit you. When we attempt to force or squeeze ourselves into their moulds, we end up looking and feeling awkward, even foolish.
It is not imitation that makes someone admirable. It is authenticity.
What makes others shine is not that they are wearing something fancy, but that they are clothed in something true. They are dressed in who they really are. When we take our eyes off others and let God design and clothe us through His word, His wisdom, and His process, we begin to wear what fits us best.
Why carry the unbearable weight of imitation when God has called you to authenticity? It is exhausting trying to be someone else. It is draining trying to speak in a voice that isn’t yours or walk a path not designed for your feet.
David could not fight in Saul’s armour. Not because Saul’s armour was evil or bad, but because it wasn’t his. The outfit was unlike him. He couldn’t walk or move in it. If he forced himself to move around in Saul’s armour, He would have made a fool of himself and even ended up stumbling his way over to Goliath clumsily. So he said, “I cannot go in these, because I am not used to them” (see 1 Samuel 17:38-39).
That is the wisdom we must go about life with. If it isn’t tailored to you, it will hinder rather than help you, because when we try to be who we are not, we end up wasting time, stumbling, and walking clumsily through life. We achieve little or nothing because we are forcing ourselves into a mould that was never meant for us. The saddest part is losing the very beauty that God placed uniquely in you.
There comes a point when you realise that someone else’s fit might be their strength but your hindrance. We must learn to trust that God knows our measurements. He knows how to tailor every part of our lives to suit our journey.
Be True to Yourself and To Your Calling
Be true to yourself. Let God be your Designer. Let the Holy Spirit clothe you in garments of grace, truth, strength, and purpose, because nothing looks more beautiful on you than what God made for you.
It is far more graceful to walk in the shoes that fit you best, while still being mindful of the occasion. To sound like you, while speaking gracious words as one taught by the Spirit of God (Colossians 4:6). To dress with your unique taste, decent, beautiful, and inspired by the Holy Spirit. To choose not to mimic the gestures, accents, tone, or expressions of others just because they look or sound powerful when they do it.
Let go of the pressure to copy the boss, mentor, woman or man of God you admire. They are not your standard. Christ is your standard and you were never called to be the next them, you were called to be you, refined and moulded by the Holy Spirit.
Live without the burden of imitation. Strive to please God alone. When the Holy Spirit is the one shaping you, what you wear, spiritually and naturally, will always fit perfectly and always remember:
You are beautiful.
You are handsome.
You are enough and Jesus Christ shining through you and in you is the hope of glory. (Colossians 1:27)
