164 | Manoah and His Wife: Parents Who Asked God for the Manual

Judges 13 | Parenting with God’s Instruction

Have you ever looked at your child, especially in those toddler years and just thought, “Lord, have mercy. I have no idea what I’m doing. Please help me”?

I know I have…. parenting many times is not a handful, it’s a tankful brethren! Because whaaattt😂

My staring at my sons bewildered is usually followed by me looking up and saying, ‘God abeg, show me how to raise this child. Help me Lord Jesus Christ. Help me see and understand your son….’

As my sons grow, I find myself whispering that prayer more often than I ever imagined. “Lord, have mercy. Show me how to raise this child.” And it gets even more real when you have more than one. Though they came from the same womb, it becomes clear very quickly, they are not the same. Different temperaments. Different needs. Different ways they respond to love, correction, or even just a simple “no.”

And if we’re being honest, this is where many parents start to feel overwhelmed. It’s tempting, sometimes unconsciously, to tilt toward one child more than the other. Maybe because one is easier, or one feels more like you. But we’ve seen, even in Scripture, how dangerous favoritism can be in a family. The wounds it leaves behind can take generations to heal.

So, we look at parents like Manoah. When the angel of the Lord came to announce Samson’s birth, Manoah didn’t assume he knew what to do. He didn’t say, “I’ve got this.” He prayed. “Lord, teach me how to raise this child.” (Judges 13:8). Not just these children, but this one. Each one. Individually. As uniquely as God made them.

That’s where godly parenting begins, not with confidence, but with surrender.

When God announced the birth of Samson, He wasn’t just introducing a mighty man, He was preparing the kind of parents needed to steward such a calling. We often talk about Samson’s strength, but before the boy ever lifted a jawbone or grew a single lock of hair, God began with his parents. 

Every Child Has a Way And God Knows It

God has a purpose for every child He blesses us with. So, they come into the world already known by Him, already set apart for something specific. Every child carries a destiny and every destiny has a path and God Knows It. Before they ever arrived in our arms, they were known in His heart. 

God told Jeremiah: “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart” (Jeremiah 1:5)

This wasn’t just true for prophets like Jeremiah. It’s true of your child, my child, every child. They are not random. They are not accidents of biology, they are intentional gifts from God with specific assignments. As parents, our job is not to shape them into our idea of who they should be, but to discover who God already designed them to be. To do that, we must ask like Manoah did, “Lord, teach us how to raise this child.” When Manoah’s wife told him about the angel’s message, Manoah didn’t brush it off or assume he had it figured out.

He prayed: “Pardon your servant, Lord. I beg you to let the man of God you sent to us come again to teach us how to bring up the boy who is to be born.” (Judges 13:8)

God honored their hunger for instruction and the angel returned to give them further instructions. These instructions were not just about health; they were about consecration. Manoah and his wife didn’t argue. They listened. They obeyed. They didn’t try to “modernize” the instruction or adjust it for convenience. They surrendered.

That’s intentional fatherhood. That’s spiritual leadership. Manoah wasn’t just physically present, he was spiritually alert. Manoah teaches us that beyond desiring a child, we must covet the wisdom to raise them in God’s way. 

God Doesn’t Always Give the Whole Manual

Sometimes, when we pray, God gives clear instructions like He did for Samson. Other times, He simply says, “Follow Me.” And that’s enough.

It doesn’t mean God loves us or our children any less.
Sometimes He withholds specifics not out of distance, but for protection.
So that we don’t speak against what we don’t understand.
So that we don’t try to control what we’re meant to trust Him with.

Whether we raise our children with detailed instructions or moment-by-moment nudges, one thing is sure:

God cares. And He still guides. Sometimes God reveals in full. Other times, He leads step by step. Either way, the invitation is the same:
Come and ask.
Walk with Me.
Trust Me with this child.

Ask God for the Way

It’s not far-fetched to call Manoah an involved father. He modeled what we are all called to do: ask. Not once. Continually. He didn’t assume he knew the way; he asked. And that’s our call too. As parents, we have the holy responsibility to consult God, to ask, “Lord, what is the way for this child?” 

Parenting is too sacred to rely on trends or assumptions.
We need the voice of the One who formed them.
We need God (their actual Father) to raise His children well.

Finally, don’t assume you know how to raise a child just because you have one. And even if you have more than one, don’t copy and paste your approach. Each child is different, with their own wiring and their own assignment from God. Our job is to ask for the manual for each one.

So today, take a deep breath.
Lay aside pressure.
Pause and pray: “Lord, show me the way for this child.”
And believe that there is a way for your child, and God will show it to you.

Thoughts for the Journey of Parenting

Dear parents,

• Do you ask God how to raise your children?
  Not just for their health and provision but for their calling, their consecration, their growth?
• Are you humble enough to say, “Teach us, Lord”?
  Even after years of parenting, His wisdom is still better.
• Are you raising your child for comfort or for consecration?
  A Nazarite child couldn’t live like others. And some children are born with such purpose that they must be raised differently.

May We Be Like Manoah and His Wife

Parents who don’t just pray for the child but for how to raise the child.

Parents who respond to prophecy with preparation.
Parents who honour each other’s spiritual encounters.

God is not silent. He still gives wisdom to those who ask.

And He delights in helping you raise the child He entrusted to you.