Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus… who humbled himself… (Philippians 2:5-8)
C.S. Lewis once said humility isn’t thinking less of yourself; it’s thinking of yourself less. Some ‘foundational blocks’ aren’t shiny. They don’t sparkle with the glow of “confidence” or shine with the gleam of “excellence.” But without them, the ‘house’ will crumble. One of such blocks is humility. It is essential for everyone: children, parents, singles, and everyone in between.
Humility is the ability to see yourself the way God sees you. It’s recognizing your worth in His eyes, while also acknowledging your need for His help. It’s not about pretending to be less than you are. It’s being real, understanding your limitations, and allowing God’s grace to fill in the gaps.
If anyone had the right to say, “Do you know who I am?”, it was Jesus Christ. But despite all that power, all that wisdom, all that divine authority, He chose to humble Himself. Jesus was fully aware of His identity, fully secure in His position, but He was completely submitted to the Father. His humility wasn’t a sign of weakness, it was the truest form of strength.
Humility is strength under control. It’s recognizing who you are, but also understanding that you’re not the center of everything. It’s saying, I don’t know it all, but I’m open to learning and growing.
Philippians 2:3 “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves.”
I’ve learned that one of the most important things we can do as parents, or even as individuals, is lay a solid foundation for humility. It’s a foundational stone that shapes not just how we relate to others, but more importantly, how we relate to God and ourselves. We live in a world that pushes us to be strong, confident, and assertive, and don’t get me wrong, those things are good in their place. But sometimes, we forget that humility doesn’t mean weakness. Humility is strength, but it’s the strength to admit when we’re wrong, to ask for help, and to trust God even when things don’t make sense.
Humility in Parenting: The Power of Asking “Why”
Humility in parenting many times looks like understanding over assumption. It’s slowing down to listen first, rather than jumping to correct based on a quick judgment. It’s admitting, I don’t have all the answers. Humility in this context creates space for connection, rather than correction. It leads to discipline that is rooted in mercy and understanding, not just reaction.
Proverbs 18:13 says, “To answer before listening—that is folly and shame.” Humility teaches us that it’s okay to ask questions and to listen.
As a parent, I’ve had moments where I found myself saying “I’m sorry” to my sons more than I should, not because I was always wrong, but because I was too quick to react. I didn’t pause to understand what was really going on or what they were thinking. I was so focused on correcting behavior that I forgot to listen first.
Then, one day, I decided to change my approach. Instead of reacting immediately, I started asking my son:
“Why did you do that?”
“What was going through your mind when you made that decision?”
This small shift in behavior, asking the simple question, “Why?”, changed everything. I began to realize that many times, what appeared as defiance was actually confusion. What looked like carelessness was often curiosity. There were moments when no discipline was needed, just a conversation and sometimes a hug. Now, before I raise my voice, I raise a question instead: “Why?” That simple word opens up a world of connection and insight, it allows me to parent with understanding and love.
Humility in Singleness: Waiting Well
For singles, it’s easy to get impatient, to believe that we deserve what we’re praying for right now, but humility teaches us the value of waiting well. It helps quiet the inner voice that says, “I deserve this now,” and teaches us to embrace the process of becoming ready for what God has planned.
I once read, “It takes humility to admit you’re not yet ready for what you’re praying for.” Humility isn’t about thinking less of yourself, it’s about recognizing that growth, preparation, and sometimes even delay are part of God’s perfect plan for us. It’s about trusting that His timing is better than our own and that there’s always something deeper He’s working in us during the wait and that His plan is bigger than our immediate desires and that growth is a process.
Teaching Humility in the Everyday
Humility isn’t just a theoretical concept. It’s about how we live, how we treat others, and how we handle life’s messes. It doesn’t mean we won’t mess up again or have moments when we’ll fail. What humility does mean is that we are teachable, willing to grow, and ready to make things right when we’ve gone off track.
Here’s how we can teach humility in the everyday:
Take correction with grace. Let your kids hear you say, “Thank you, I didn’t see it that way.” That’s how they’ll learn to accept correction themselves. It might feel like a small moment, but it teaches them that correction isn’t something to fear or avoid, it’s something to learn from.
These children we’re raising these days truly seem built different. It’s as if they came with a setting that allows them to express themselves freely and question things more than we ever dared to. That freedom of expression isn’t a flaw, it’s an opportunity. But if we want them to grow with it wisely, they need to see us model humility first. When they see us, as parents, take correction without defensiveness, they learn that it’s safe to be wrong and powerful to admit it.
It was initially unusual for me, because I didn’t grow up being that expressive, neither did I see many children who were. We were taught to obey, to stay quiet, and not ask too many questions. So having children who speak up, ask why, and even challenge my tone or decision felt unsettling at first. But I’m glad I didn’t shut it down. I’m learning that their expression is not rebellion, it’s a gift. It’s a sign of boldness and clarity, and if guided properly, it will serve them well in life.
My job is to help shape that voice, not silence it. And to do that, I have to model what it means to listen, to be corrected, and to stay humble, no matter my age or title.
Let your children see you pray, not just the bold, fiery prayers, but also the quiet, humble ones. Let them see that you’re learning too and that you too are depending on God. Admit when you’re wrong and apologise sincerely. I’ve sat with my kids and said, “Mummy didn’t handle that right. I’m sorry.” It doesn’t make me weak, if anything, they saw the strength of humility.
Teach them to serve without expecting recognition. Sometimes the most powerful lessons in humility are the ones that go unnoticed.
Building homes where humility is seen not as weakness, but as wisdom is how we raise children who aren’t entitled. Children who can apologize first, repent quickly, and take responsibility without shifting blame. And it starts with us. When we normalize humility in our everyday interactions, apologising to our kids, receiving correction with grace, and admitting when we need help, we create an atmosphere where pride has no room to grow, but character does.
Confessions of Humility:
- I choose humility just as Jesus Christ did. I humble myself before God and others, I recognize that His grace is sufficient for me. (Philippians 2:5-8)
- I value others and am open to learning from them, because I know that humility invites wisdom into my life. (Philippians 2:3)
- I recognize that I am dependent on God’s strength, and I surrender my pride to His divine hand, I trust that He will exalt me in due time. (1 Peter 5:6)
- I choose to listen carefully and seek understanding before responding. My heart is open to learning from my children and not just correcting them. (Proverbs 18:13)
- I trust in God’s perfect timing. I wait patiently, because I know that He is working all things for my good. (Isaiah 55:8-9)
- I embrace correction as a sign of love and wisdom. I choose to grow through God’s teaching and discipline. I model kindness, forgiveness, grace, patience, love and humility for my children, I teach them the power of a gentle and humble heart. (Proverbs 12:1)
- I humble myself before the Lord daily, trusting that He will raise me up in His perfect time. (James 4:10)
- I serve with a humble heart, because I know that true greatness comes from serving others without seeking recognition. (Matthew 20:16)
